 |
| #3748 | | Barbara's Rules of Bitter Experience:
(1) When you empty a drawer for his clothes
and a shelf for his toiletries, the relationship ends.
(2) When you finally buy pretty stationary
to continue the correspondence, he stops writing.
|
|
| #3749 | | Barker's Proof:
Proofreading is more effective after publication.
|
|
| #3750 | | Barometer, n.:
An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we
are having.
-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
|
|
| #3751 | | Barth's Distinction:
There are two types of people: those who divide people into two
types, and those who don't.
|
|
| #3752 | | Baruch's Observation:
If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
|
|
| #3753 | | Basic Definitions of Science:
If it's green or wiggles, it's biology.
If it stinks, it's chemistry.
If it doesn't work, it's physics.
|
|
| #3754 | | BASIC, n.:
A programming language. Related to certain social diseases in
that those who have it will not admit it in polite company.
|
|
| #3755 | | Bathquake, n.:
The violent quake that rattles the entire house when the water
faucet is turned on to a certain point.
-- Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
|
|
| #3756 | | Battle, n.:
A method of untying with the teeth a political knot that
will not yield to the tongue.
-- Ambrose Bierce
|
|
| #3757 | | Beauty, n.:
The power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
-- Ambrose Bierce
|
|
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