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| #4381 | | Performance:
A statement of the speed at which a computer system works. Or
rather, might work under certain circumstances. Or was rumored
to be working over in Jersey about a month ago.
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| #4382 | | pessimist:
A man who spends all his time worrying about how he can keep the
wolf from the door.
optimist:
A man who refuses to see the wolf until he seizes the seat of
his pants.
opportunist:
A man who invites the wolf in and appears the next day in a fur coat.
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| #4383 | | Peter's Law of Substitution:
Look after the molehills, and the
mountains will look after themselves.
Peter's Principle of Success:
Get up one time more than you're knocked down.
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| #4384 | | Peterson's Admonition:
When you think you're going down for the third time --
just remember that you may have counted wrong.
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| #4385 | | Peterson's Rules:
(1) Trucks that overturn on freeways are filled with something sticky.
(2) No cute baby in a carriage is ever a girl when called one.
(3) Things that tick are not always clocks.
(4) Suicide only works when you're bluffing.
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| #4386 | | petribar:
Any sun-bleached prehistoric candy that has been sitting in
the window of a vending machine too long.
-- Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
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| #4387 | | Phases of a Project:
(1) Exultation.
(2) Disenchantment.
(3) Confusion.
(4) Search for the Guilty.
(5) Punishment for the Innocent.
(6) Distinction for the Uninvolved.
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| #4388 | | philosophy:
The ability to bear with calmness the misfortunes of our friends.
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| #4389 | | philosophy:
Unintelligible answers to insoluble problems.
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| #4390 | | phosflink:
To flick a bulb on and off when it burns out (as if, somehow, that
will bring it back to life).
-- "Sniglets", Rich Hall & Friends
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