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| #4561 | | Rules for Writers:
Avoid run-on sentences they are hard to read. Don't use no double
negatives. Use the semicolon properly, always use it where it is appropriate;
and never where it isn't. Reserve the apostrophe for it's proper use and
omit it when its not needed. No sentence fragments. Avoid commas, that are
unnecessary. Eschew dialect, irregardless. And don't start a sentence with
a conjunction. Hyphenate between sy-llables and avoid un-necessary hyphens.
Write all adverbial forms correct. Don't use contractions in formal writing.
Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided. It is incumbent on
us to avoid archaisms. Steer clear of incorrect forms of verbs that have
snuck in the language. Never, ever use repetitive redundancies. If I've
told you once, I've told you a thousand times, resist hyperbole. Also,
avoid awkward or affected alliteration. Don't string too many prepositional
phrases together unless you are walking through the valley of the shadow of
death. "Avoid overuse of 'quotation "marks."'"
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| #4562 | | Rune's Rule:
If you don't care where you are, you ain't lost.
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| #4563 | | Ryan's Law:
Make three correct guesses consecutively
and you will establish yourself as an expert.
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| #4564 | | Sacher's Observation:
Some people grow with responsibility -- others merely swell.
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| #4565 | | Satellite Safety Tip #14:
If you see a bright streak in the sky coming at you, duck.
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| #4566 | | Sattinger's Law:
It works better if you plug it in.
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| #4567 | | Savage's Law of Expediency:
You want it bad, you'll get it bad.
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| #4568 | | scenario, n.:
An imagined sequence of events that provides the context in
which a business decision is made. Scenarios always come in
sets of three: best case, worst case, and just in case.
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| #4569 | | Schapiro's Explanation:
The grass is always greener on the other side -- but that's
because they use more manure.
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| #4570 | | Schlattwhapper, n.:
The window shade that allows itself to be pulled down,
hesitates for a second, then snaps up in your face.
-- Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
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